Good Deals

I get these emails all the time for special reduced fares on airlines. They usually get the delete button faster than it takes the squirrels to discover peanuts in the feeder. But this time I thought, well let's just see what you can do for me on a flight between where we live and where my parents live. Now, it's only about 400 miles, and is about a 50 minute flight, normally. We usually always drive it in around 6.5 hours, depending on number of stops and so on. However, there have been issues lately and a need to go more often. So, let's just see. I typed in the itinerary, and waited while it was thinking. The 'good deal' they could offer me was a flight that would take about 5 hours, due to 2 layovers that were wildly out of the way. And for this gloriously lengthy flight, and 2 plane changes, I was privileged to pay around $550. Normally it's around $299. Well, I guess THAT website is not all it's cracked up to be.

Pain Level 1

Bionic man has wild eyebrows. No one would dispute me here. From time to time I suggest that he get them professionally groomed. He scoffs at such decadence. He says they are a distinctive part of his persona as a scientist.*(See the mad scientist in Back to the Future) However, once in a blue moon, I can't stand it anymore when one of those recalcitrant hairs starts to impede his vision. Do you put a barrette in it? I think I could have braided and beaded these this morning. So I very quietly got up from breakfast to fetch a pair of tweezers. (By the way, I have found THE best tweezers ever invented, Uncle Bill's Silver Gripper, The tweezers with Pin Point Precision). I arrived back at the table, tweezers in hand, and announced that several of those brow hairs had to go. Reluctantly he agreed I could operate. After pulling 2, and showing him the offenders, he looked at me with sad eyes and said, "Am I bleeding?" I asked him on a scale of 1 to 10, what his pain level really was and he admitted it was only a 1, which, when you think about the incident in the emergency room when he broke his hip and told the nurse his pain level was only a 2, is pretty enormous. He also admits he must have been in shock when he said that.

Lowest Common Denominator

My curling iron died last week, when I was out of town. You soldier on. However, it was interesting to note the pile of warnings and disclaimers. First thing was on a separate piece of white paper, written in red ink. "The high performance heater in this unit contains an oil-based protective coating which will burn off with initial use and may emit smoke and an odor. This is completely normal." Good to know.

Then there was a little smaller heavier piece of white paper with those circles with lines through them on the front and back. "Caution this product can burn eyes" and "Warning, Burn Hazard. Keep Away from Children." I'll leave the actual diagrams to your own imaginations. Sometimes that's more fun. You know, a face, with the curling iron poked right into it.

Then came the instruction booklet. Even better. "Never use while sleeping." Think of the time you could save. "This curling iron is HOT when in use. Use the handle." "DO NOT use while bathing." Again, another timesaver we can't do. Wow!

Voting Day

Last week I was part of the process. I worked as an election judge. This election was definitely not a major one. Only one person was running for city council, and then there was the school board. Even though decisions the school board makes will influence the next generation of children, no one bothers to educate themselves on the candidates. So I worked 15 hours that day and we had a grand total of 85 voters. But while we were not being busy, my coworkers at the poll were a little questionable. One older lady had to have been high on something, or maybe she was wearing too many nicotine patches. She was literally bouncing off the walls, dancing, singing. And one of the others was urging her on, all the while telling awful jokes and making puns out of everything. It was a very long day.

Daylight Savings Time

Tonight is the night I look forward to all summer. We get to change our clocks backwards, thus giving us an extra hour of sleep. First of all, I know this is just a government ploy to make us all grateful that they are giving us 'extra' time, when in reality, it was they who stole it from us months ago. The reason they moved the dates on DST is because they think we won't remember. But I remember.

That being said, one year I was in Phoenix on the fateful day when the time changed back. I've been tired ever since. They don't do DST there. It's the only state in the union who doesn't, I think, except for pockets of rebels in Indiana. So, there I was, stuck somewhere where I couldn't get my hour back, and by the time I got back home, it was too late. Don't be like me. Never be in AZ when DST returns to normal time.