Banned for Life

I think I was nearly banned for life from Target today. I was at the pharmacy. For some people, they will already be nodding knowingly. My whole episode started a month ago when Bionic Man broke his hip. In fact I think I can safely blame this whole summer on him. But since I was in another state, and it really really looked like we weren't going to get home on schedule, I was going to be running out of my prescriptions pills. All of these national chains claim that in the event something like this happens, all you need to do is go to the local one and since they are all interconnected via their computer systems, it's really very easy to get the stuff you need. They were right, last month. So, this week, which is about a month later, I got the automated call saying my prescriptions were ready. I didn't bother listening to the entire message. I went over on Wednesday to pick them up. They acted like they had never heard of me before. Upon some searching they discovered that my prescriptions were all ready to pick up, in South Carolina. And since they were transferred down there, apparently, they would need to call my doctor who would have to reauthorize them. They would call me. Yesterday I got 2 calls, one from SC and one from here. The person in SC is more urgent this time. I went over to Target this morning. They have 1 of 3 ready. Only one doctor had responded. Well, all 3 were prescribed by the same doctor, only, my doctor must have been out of the office the day they called some other time and so there's a strange name on one of the prescriptions. No one can explain why my doctor didn't authorize the second one with his name on it. So, I'm trying to explain the whole problem to this multi pierced girl with a spike on her head. Meanwhile, Bionic Man has collected his electrical tape and is standing about 6 feet behind me calling my name over and over. Between the piercings and the spike and the name calling I am losing my concentration. So, I turned around and told him to please shut up for a minute. There was an audible gasp. How could I speak to a man with a cane like that? And there were quite a few people in line by now. And that was when I nearly was banned. But I made Bionic Man promise to blame Target and the spiky headed girl for my demise, in my obituary.