They're Ba-a-a-ack

Last week it happened. The ants are back. They have found me. Last time I was invaded I had to move, change my address, get a new hairdo, and essentially live undercover for 10 years. It is sort of like being in the witness protection program, only no FBI. But last week, as I was minding my own business, doing my email, I noticed him. He was standing perfectly still, staring at me, not 12 inches away. I think he thought if he stood completely motionless that I couldn't see him, so I played along. After about 10 minutes, he moved. It was nearly imperceptible. He started to lift his left front leg, and very slowly turn. I pretended not to see. Then it was the right leg. I knew he was about to make a break for it, and deftly made my move. He nearly got away as I was unaware of the uneven surface he was standing on, but I pinched him and then flushed him, the ultimate indignity. That was 6 days ago. Since then I have killed 12 more. It makes no difference to me that 'this is a bad year for ants', I don't want them in my house. And clearly, it's a bad year for ants at my house. I am hoping I don't have to change identities and addresses again. Stay tuned.